Here is the full text of Gray Matter for this week. The edited version can be found online at www.couleenews.com
Enjoy! - tdg
Skip the middle man in politics
Every Sunday, C-SPAN provides American viewers with a glimpse into British Parliament with the Prime Minister’s Questions, a weekly give-and-take forum between Tony Blair and the members of the House of Commons. It’s almost like Fox News’ O’Reilly Factor on steroids. Tony Blair’s detractors fire witty dissent against him directly instead of through the media and Tony Blair returns fire in kind.
It would be entertaining if President Bush and Congress adopted the same format for the President’s Weekly Radio Address. The current format of the president speaking on national radio followed by the opposing party response is, shall we say, blasé.
A live, witty exchange on television between the Executive and Legislative branches of government just might be the vehicle for transparency in government.
I don’t know what that kind of weekly exchange would look like. So, I offer, by way of example, a parody of last week’s State of the Union whose topics will spill over into Bush’s weekly remarks. Included are possible responses from legislators on both sides of the aisle.
Bush: [The majority of the speech]
Senator Ted Kennedy: Zzzzzzzzzzz. (Dreaming about a government without conservatives.)
Senator Barack Obama: I hope da Bears win the Superbowl. I hope da Bears win the Superbowl.
Bush: First, we must balance the federal budget. We can do so without raising taxes.
Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi: Yeah right, mister. That’s what you think. I’m glad I’m sitting behind you to see your better side. I don’t think I could look at you face-to-face. Oh, that’s right…I told the folks to show George some respect. It’s a good thing he’s not a mind reader.
Bush: We need to…conserve 8.5 million more gallons of gasoline by 2017.
Vice-President Cheney: Thanks for the warning, boss. I’ll be sure to sell short on my Halliburton stock options long before 2017 so I can have some sort of income in retirement.
Bush: …to win the war on terror we must take the fight to the enemy.
Senator Hillary Clinton: I don’t have the penchant for fighting like you. But I’ll tell you one fight I’ll bring – my candidacy to occupy the Oval Office. I’m in to win, you know. I just have to keep my husband away from the interns.
Bush: [On his proposed Civilian Reserve Corps] It would ease the burden on the Armed Forces by allowing us to hire civilians with critical skills to serve on missions abroad when America needs them.
Senator John McCain: Hire civilians, huh? This sounds like something out of a Vince Flynn novel. Something similar to Mitch Rapp’s ex-Special Ops contacts operating a civilian government- contract company is an excellent idea. Our men and women in uniform, God bless ‘em, need a break. Maybe we can get Jack Bauer, MacGyver and the A-Team while we’re at it.
OK, so the responses are from my imagination. However, I would love to see a live, spirited debate TV show between President Bush and the members of Congress each week. Hopefully, Jerry Springer won’t volunteer to produce it.
